Why Penis Size Matter?
I wanted to talk about penis size today. I’m so sick of women who pretend to adore enormous cocks. It is just a lie.
From experience:
- An enormous cock is a challenge – not a good one.
- An enormous cock can’t get all inside
- thus you never feel full
- and you can’t feel your partner’s pubis on yours
- thus it doesn’t stimulate your clitoris
- An enormous cock fucking hurts.
- An enormous cock isn’t fun to suck – forget about deep throat.
- An enormous cock is scary.
I’ll stop right here (for now) and won’t apologize to those of you who have an enormous cock if what I said made you feel unsuited.
Maybe I have a small vagina. But I doubt it. One of my friend tried the same enormous cock I’m referring to as my experience and she felt the same way I did.

The perfect penis size titillates the back of my throat, it doesn’t suffocate me.
This post is a message to all men who wish they had a bigger penis while theirs is probably just the perfect size.
It is also a post to the men who had the impudence to tell me that my partner’s penis was to small and that theirs were much better because bigger.
I’m a real woman (not a man disguised as woman who writes a blog about her sex life – gosh I hate those too!!!) and I love a penis that fits in my two hands while I can lick the head or suck it tenderly. That’s about how long a penis should be.
As for the diameter, it has to be just about the same size as my wrist…
Ok guys… I have very small hands (size 7) and wrist (less then 6 inches circumference)
So please stop saying you have a big penis to attract women and stop worrying about your penis size if it doesn’t look as big as the last porno you downloaded.
Are you or did you ever worried about your penis size? Do you (still) think that women prefer the super size cock? I’d love your comments on that!
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In that case, my size, like a work of ancient marble sculpture, is perfect…
Yes, absolutely Ed
Yes Yes Ed we all are perfect
Nearly everything can be described as a bell curve, and that includes cock and vagina size. Some of both men and women fall into either side of that curve, and will probably be happiest with someone that is on the same side of the curve as them (actually this preference is probably a bell curve itself.)
If I remember correctly the Karma Sutra makes reference to something along these lines. (a quick google search shows me that I do remember correctly, it is actually the first page of Chapter 1.)
For those who are in the low part of the bell curve like me and don’t know what it is you can learn with this wikipedia information page.
Thanks for pointing this interesting point of view Aaron. Tho I haven’t read the whole article on wiki, I am already having some spikes on my head.
I will go look for my bell curve hold on
You do not need a bell curve to understand that having a big cock is not every womens wishes as much guys do not always search those big tities porno girls. All this has been created and pushed by the media.
Most of the peoples only want someone they feel great with, respected and free to live their sexuality without being judged every time that you or her/him are having a dirty fantasy. The result is a great sex life as long that you learn to look at the other as a sexual being having dirty minded needs same as yours during the sex games.
Valerie, after reading your comment I think I need to clear something up. I am not referring to the book you linked to in your post, (which I have read, and as a psychologist almost categorically disagree with) but instead to the general idea of normal distribution, which unfortunately has a math heavy and not very friendly Wikipedia entry.
What I was trying to say is that the distribution of both penis and vagina sizes fit into a normative distribution curve, but most of the time when we try to look at ‘what women want’ in penis size we never take into account that vagina size is also distributed.
In other words, women with smaller vaginas will, more often then not, prefer men with smaller penises, and vice versa. It is not really all that profound a statement, but it is something that almost all the research (and our consequent conversations) fails to take into account.
On a personal note, I would never dare attempt to suggest that you personally are on the low end of the intelligence curve. I, and I feel that can probably speak for most of your constant readers in this, read your blog because I find your writing to be eloquent, insightful, and fiercely brave. Thank you for that.
Thank you Aaron for clarifying things up. As Eric said, “The Media” brainwashes our ideas about sexuality and I guess that’s what I was aiming at.
I guess reality isn’t selling enough for those multi-billion industries. It’s just to bad us that we have no choice but to look at it at some point or an other even tho we have the strongest will to say no.
Anyway… thanks also for the sweet comment about my writing. It touches me a lot since I consider it be quite mediocre compare to what I could do in french. But it would be no good and worst then my english because then almost no one would understand
I’ve been worried about my penis size since a girl dumped me for having too small of one for her. We dated a couple of times, made out at her place afterwards. On the third date, she felt me up as we were making out, and then it was all over – she feigned tiredness and said she was sleepy. I never saw her again romantically. She later said we were moving too fast. I never asked her if it was about my penis, but the cliche holds true – actions speak louder than words.
In any case Valerie, I’m smaller than your partner. So I get what you’re posting, but it doesn’t allay my worries about my size.
[...] know I’ve rant about big cocks a few days ago, but read the full story and you’ll see why I’ve link to Selena [...]
Here a testimony of a couple. I (male) have been complexed all my life (even now) by the size of my cock. May be too much porn in my youth. I had lot of partners that explains me that they were completely satisfied but that never convinced me. I was thinking that they were nice with me. I have been trought the RUBBOT test and I am in the low side of the average guy.
I (female) never understood why men and specially mine, are complexing so much about that. I have know many cocks in my sex life from big to very small. My husband is on the low average that I have practiced (so the rubbot test is conform to my expierience) but IT DOESN’T MATTERS. He drives me up the wall in less than 1 minute and keep me up as long as I need (or can support). I do agree with Valerie statement: a long dick doesn’t stimulate you well (pubis & clit). I have to add something. Long dick are so sellassured of their superiority in bed that they are insufficient in preliminary too impatient they are to penetrate women with they big thing. My “biggest” partner never made me scream as I do now with my “average joe”. He hurted me more than anything else.
To conclude, never forget the sentiments are a part of the deal…
So here we are. The male will never be satified but the female is perfectly alright with that… That life. And a little bit of the Venus vs Mars theory…
Wow, thank you for sharing. This is a delicate subject and I love how you guys approached it.
“Long dick are so sellassured of their superiority in bed [...]” maybe, just maybe, that’s why the average or below cocks are such wonderful lovers…
I didn’t go read the links (at work), but I am average in length and girth (circumference), and my girlfriend likes it too.
These enormous cocks in porn can get quite out of hand (Monsters of Cock, for one), but there have been a few where the guy was ‘average’, but didn’t last very long because he was not used to ‘porn star’ girls and/or the camera.
-Josh
How did I ever miss this discussion?
I had a hot-tub night a few weeks ago with a friend (yes, that kind of friend), and described to me an evening in the hot tub with another girl friend and a guy (friend of a friend), who’s cock nearly hung down to his knees.
Now, I had to think to myself (and out loud I did), how does a dude that long keep his dick from dangling in the toilet water, hmmm?
Sounds more like a curse than a blessing.
I’m not sure if I’m ‘average’ or above or below (what is average?) in length or girth, but it’s sure fun to find out how I fit in a willing girl!
Dave
[...] my post about Why Penis Size Matter? Well this morning I found (in my mailbox) the book How to Live with a Huge Penis that gives advice [...]
We really are talking about a cultural problem.
Men have very few things that define them as men. Violence, money, fame and sexuality are the bases for masculine power in Western culture at this time in history. Fear of having a small penis or the desire to always have a bigger penis is link to his sexuality, and his masculinity.
Books like these have talked about this problem:
Susan Faludi – “Stiffed”
Terrence Real – “I don’t want to talk about it”
From my own experience, I have always been worried that I was “not large enough”.
When I was 17 I had my first girlfriend. She told me one night after sex that she loved how we “fit” together perfectly. I was the right size and build and even my penis was perfect for her. … Then she talked about how her last boyfriend was maybe 2 inches longer then me and though it felt wonderful at times at other times it hurt her. All I heard was that I was smaller and not able to give her all the pleasure she had with him.
In my late 20’s, and after a bad break up, I tried the swinger lifestyle. Over the course of a year I went out with a little less than a dozen women and couples. Every woman (without prompting) told me I was a “perfect” size. I spent one afternoon with an older couple who had been in the lifestyle for over a decade, and they both told me that I had a perfect penis size.
The husband: “You made (the wife’s) pussy squirt with just your dick. I have only seen her do that with one other guy!”
I finally got the message: MARK! YOUR PENIS IS JUST FINE! STOP WORRYING ABOUT IT!
For the most part I have stopped worrying about it. However, there are times in my life when I get self conscious and I pull out the measuring tape.
For the record, I am a cut, 6.5″ measured on top, 7.5″ measured from the side, and 6″ in circumference in the middle which is the thickest point with a smaller head.
It has been almost a year and a half since my fiancé died. So I have started chat again in a singles chat room taking things slow. VERY SLOW. But I was worried and concerned about all the things I see as faults: my balding head, being out of shape and roughly 60 pounds over weight, all my clothes are about 2 or so years old because I just haven’t even thought about that stuff in such a long time and on and on…. Then I watch porn and sometimes I wonder if I have a short coming in that area as well.
Logically, I know I am fine. But like a woman with a nice figure worrying about her weight, I wonder if I was just one more inch longer and/or one more inch in circumference won’t I attract more women?
So there is some insight, I could go on but really … this is long enough.
Mark, thank you very much for sharing. we all can learn a lot from your experience.I understand men and their concerns about the size of their penises, but really, honestly and I swear it, penis size is in no way a criteria to attract a woman. Personality is. Kindness. Sense of humour. Looks will definitely have more impact then penis size even if it’s low in the criteria list – and by looks I mean if you take care of yourself.
I am sorry for your fiancé. I guess little by little you will get much better and find someone to share you life. Wish you the best
I think one of the major issues with growing up with so much porn around is that you get a really inflated view of what a “normal” dick looks like. I know I did. For years I was obsessed with my cock, trying to get it bigger through weights and pumps and whatnot. Something in particular lead to this:
My wife has never orgasmed from intercourse, but we got a silicone dildo that is about an inch longer, but more importantly slightly thicker than me. When using it on her, she came and I suddenly felt very, very inadequate. Funny how one thing can completely send you off the rails.
The other thing I absolutely *hate* about my cock is that I am a grower. In normal day to day, I have the smallest dick. it’s so tiny, but it grows to a full 6.5″ x 5.5, so once inflated, it’s completely normal, but I hate what it looks like when it’s deflated — smaller than kids. I don’t understand why that is, but it’s really embarassing, and if we ever go to a swing club or nude beach, that’s what I will be thinking about all of the time. *sigh*
Hello Valerie,
The internet has a ton of stories but not a lot of follow-ups.
A week ago I met a woman.
We met via a baseball website. We had talked and flirted online for years but I never thought anything of it. However, last Saturday was different. We got to talking and exchanged emails and IM addresses. The conversation was some what flirty to start with and got more so as we went along. Finally, I suggested going over to her place to take photos since my model cancelled for the day. She said it sounded nice but admitted we would just end up having sex. I was shocked. She mentioned she had a little bit of an online crush on me for awhile. Since there are maybe 10 females out of the 500 guys it was hard not to notice her but I didn’t think she was interested in me. We made plans. An hour and a half later (she lives in Seattle, while I live in Olympia) she met me at her door.
We both were nervous and excited. I stole a bit from “Anne Hall” and had her kiss me before the date started. We calmed down and were able to hang out.
In our conversation on IM we decided to go over to my folk’s house, they weren’t home. I think it was a way for us to get out of “her space”, OR she was really wondering about me and wanted to see some details. Anyways, we show up to the empty house only to find my sister is working in the office for the family business and wont be done for some 3 hours.
So my new friend L and I walked down to the park, then we sent to the store for snacks, then we came back. I hinted asked threatened, and begged but my sister wouldn’t leave.
So L and I put on a movie to wait her out a little longer. Which worked for about 20 seconds and I turned the tv off and we rushed up stairs to my old bedroom.
Burning with passion we stripped off our clothes. L threw herself back on the bed and told me with extreme desire to take her. Naked I grabbed her hips and pulled her to me, I wanted to taste her. She smelled wonderful. I loved the look and feel of her. My tongue and month sucked and licked hungrily. I could feel she was wet enough for me but I wanted her to cum first. I didn’t know if she would even climax from just penile thrusting.
She cums from my mouth on her clit. I slide a finger inside and touch her g-spot. I work her with my fingers and my mouth until she cums again. This time with the extra surprise of her squirting all over my hand.
I am rock hard as I finally enter her. She starts screaming and thrashing. I am all the way inside her and she is going crazy. I start thrusting and before long she climaxes. A few moments later she climaxes again. I feel her squirt on my thigh, and on my balls. She is climaxing and screaming. I am so amazed I can’t even think about my own orgasm. I stay hard just to keep her orgasms going.
Some time passes and we break off. She lays there and looks at me. We hear my sister leave. We laugh. I warned her! I say.
L gets her breathe back and tells me:
Your cock is perfect.
It is the most perfect shape and size for my pussy. It is like I am cumming from my g-spot with every single stroke. It was like I was cumming the whole time.
I nearly cried I was so happy. I held her and then we started again. Sometime around 1.30am we made it to Denny’s. I took her home. She invited me in and we couldn’t help ourselves. In all that night, we fucked for like 5 hours and she swears she was cumming or almost cumming the entire time.
Over the last week we have gotten together two more times. The results have been the same. She has said the most wonderful things about my penis. I honestly am so happy to have met someone I can make so happy. I don’t care about climaxing I get so turned on just watching her. It is just so wonderful.
We have a ton of things in common and emotionally we are taking this slow. The sex is amazing. I don’t have to worry about penis or sexual performance with her. Instead, I am eating better, and hope to start working out soon so I can keep being … as she said “the best lover she has ever had”.
Mark
Thanks very much Mark for sharing your story. It is encouraging to others and is inspiring. I’m glad to hear you and L are made for each other!
I’d love to have my 7.5” dick sucked by you… It’d be just like heaven.
I think you’re right in some cases. But a lot of women i’ve slept with enjoy a big dick. I guess if you’re in the 5-8 inch range you’re ok. Once you pass 9 though, most girls can’t handle it.